How To Dress Like A Hogette

admin | Uncategorized | 10 2nd, 2011  |  Comments Off

Sooie! Calling all Washington Redskin Hogettes and Hogette wannabees; it-s time to “drag’ out your Hogette paraphernalia and get yourselves over to the Pig Pen for some good old fashion, roll-in-the-mud type fun! Here are a few fashion tips for the aspiring Hogette:

Dress
Wear the tackiest dress you can find. If you are TV fan of boomer age, think Mrs. Roper from Three-s Company. If you-re under 25, The Nanny-s mom or Madea are good role models.

Pig Snout
A must-have accessory no aspiring Hogette would be caught dead without.

Footwear
Tube socks in Redskin yellow and red are a must, but high heels are optional. Those pesky hooves can be so annoying sometimes!

Wig
Blond, curly-haired wigs are the best just don-t get mistaken for one of those big-haired Texan women, just saying.

Accessories
It has been said that the only thing separating us from the animals is our ability to accessorize. Therefore, feel free to add sunglasses to protect yourself from the glare of greatness or your boss at work. Other accessories include beads, sashes, boas, although boas may interfere with fist-pumping, so proceed cautiously.

White Hat
The quintessential sign of a “good guy’, this accessory is a must for those aspiring to the true essence of a Hogette. Mind your P-s and Querlicues unless you want to be known as a rogue Hogette.

How will you know if you-ve achieved Hog Couture?
If little kids mistake you for Miss Piggy, you-ve arrived in Hogette Fashion Heaven.

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